Tag: sapphic book

AA-meetings – Chapter 16: Again

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Again

2019

Two agonizing weeks apart. It’s enough to drive the girls crazy. Twenty six they are now. Three years of perfect marriage bliss. Apart from the four lost years, they cherish a lifetime of memories.

It has surprised them both how great married life is. How it only makes things easier on so many levels. Except being apart. That seems to get harder as time passes.

It’s a different world to Alex right now. She stepped back from the constant traveling to roam every catwalk on this earth. Instead, she has started her own fashion brand. Photoshoots and campaigns still thrill her. They are the reason why the fashion industry and the modeling intrigues her so much, why she feels like an junkie when she hasn’t worked in a while. But luckily, she has the luxury to take on some extra projects. For now, it’s designing clothes. The best news is: people love it. Continue reading “AA-meetings – Chapter 16: Again” →

AA-meetings – Chapter 15: A Wedding

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A wedding

2016

“How come we don’t do this more often?” Amy wonders out loud, while walking down the streets of her beloved old town.

“Because I’m a famous person and shopping requires a three hour makeup preparation,” Alex sneers.

Like always, the Latina quickly kicks the fun out of it by joking around.

“Shut up and hold my hand,” Amy tells her, determined to ignore the sassy comment. “Nobody knows you’re here. So it’ll be fine.”

“It wasn’t fine yesterday. Ever since the engagement came out, the pap is on our ass twenty four seven.”

Continue reading “AA-meetings – Chapter 15: A Wedding” →

AA-meetings – Chapter 14: Apex

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Apex

2015

The second they left the catwalk event, hell broke loose. Alex never really confirmed her relationship with the lovely Amy that always followed her around. There were rumors and speculation – not to mention the countless pictures of them hanging out together – but Alex never sat down in front of the camera and confirmed them. Throwing her an engagement ring in the middle of a fashion show clearly did the trick. All the fans’ suspicious were suddenly true.

On the way to their car, three security men have to fight off interviewers and paparazzi. It’s crazy. It is suffocating. Amy holds onto Alex hand tight, like she’s afraid she’ll lose her in all the spectacle. These men scare her in a weird way. They get so close that it’s hard to see which direction to go. But Alex’s touch makes her feel safe. It guides her to the safe place of the SUV that’s waiting for them. Alex smiles proudly during those long, slow seconds it takes them to get there. Why wouldn’t she? She just go engaged!

Continue reading “AA-meetings – Chapter 14: Apex” →

Everything Leads To You – Nina Lacour

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by Nina Lacour
by Nina Lacour

Everything Leads to You by Nina Lacour is a wonderful read. Really, it is.

Our heroin is the girl we all were once: the young lesbian, Emi, in love with a girl that just isn’t worth it. Margaux is older than her and they’ve been dating for a while but the problem is: Margaux doesn’t love Emi. And yes, maybe she knows it, deep down. But the thing is: that doesn’t stop her heart from wanting, craving, begging young Emi for it to be different. Now, looking back at my younger self, I can honestly say that breaking up and getting back together 5 or 6 times (like Margaux and Emi) is in fact a reason to question the level of profound love. But as a young girl, desperately following your heart instead of your brain from time to time, it’s easy to assume that things will work out great. Continue reading “Everything Leads To You – Nina Lacour” →

AA-meetings – Chapter 13: Alternative Plan

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Alternative plan

2011

There is only one feeling that absorbs her completely. It is pain. Utter pain of constantly throwing up and feeling like her body is under attack. Her muscles and gullet hurt from the constant vomiting. Her essence is gone, her determination is destroyed.

“Oh, God, make it stop,” Alex prays to the ceiling while backing away from the tray she just dirtied completely.

She’s exhausted and she hasn’t even left the bed in days. Her dad is standing nearby, helplessly observing her every move. The warm pajamas she’s wearing still aren’t enough to stop her from shaking like crazy. It’s fever. It’s always fever. Her fingers push back the hat that’s supposed to cover her bald head.  Continue reading “AA-meetings – Chapter 13: Alternative Plan” →

AA-meetings – Chapter 10: About The Girl

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About the girl

2015

As the girls make their way across town, some people recognize the toned down version of a supermodel. A few brave fans ask for autographs or selfies. Though it seems a bit uneasy and annoying after a while, Alex happily gives in to every request. These fans pay the bills, she resonates. They are the reason why the fashion industry thinks so much of her. Amy just thinks it’s weird. Like, how awkward must it be when every single person in this world knows your name and the way you look in your underwear? Back when they were dating, Alex’s star was starting to rise, but it hadn’t reached the level she’s at now. Two months ago, she owned the Victoria Secret’s fashion show – she had been told so anyway. Millions of men and women watched and drooled over her confident, super sexy routine. Amy didn’t. The bitterness and resentful feelings from before kept her from giving in to the curiosity. Now that they have established this sort of being back together thing, she can’t wait to stream the show online. Continue reading “AA-meetings – Chapter 10: About The Girl” →

AA-meetings – Chapter 9: Apart Until Now

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Apart until now
2015

The most massive headache is starting to develop itself inside of Amy’s head. She ran into the bathroom the minute Alex uttered the earth-shattering reason why she left. It doesn’t make any sense to her. Her memory, her mind, they all made up versions. Versions that had nothing to do with any of this. They pictured Alex as a fucked up little brat, ready to dive head-first into the world of modeling at the cost of leaving everything and everyone behind. They came up with the image of that Latina hotness, ditching her loved ones and her education to chase the big piles of money that were luring her in. And maybe there was even one version … one that had kept her up for nights, that made her wish from the bottom of her heart she was wrong about: that Alex simply didn’t love her enough to stay. That it had all been a teenage romance to her and Amy’s feelings were so much stronger than hers. Continue reading “AA-meetings – Chapter 9: Apart Until Now” →

AA-meetings – Chapter 7: Apart For Too Long

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Apart for too long

2015

It’s one p.m. when a soaking wet Alex shoots up in her bed. She’s panting uncontrollably, with eyes wide open. It takes a while before she realizes where she is. Then, the old memories of her teenage bedroom appear to be real. It’s not a dream. Not anymore.

She quickly throws her feet out of the bed and runs some fingers through her voluminous hair. The tiny knots of her hair extensions interrupt the smooth gesture. Not a lot has changed around the place. Not the people that live here, not the way it smells like cinnamon wherever you go, not the boisterous sounds reverberating from room to room. A pack of men and one girl. A pack of Spanish wolves. Just one thing. One person that used to always be here.

Continue reading “AA-meetings – Chapter 7: Apart For Too Long” →

AA-meetings – Chapter 6: Acceptance

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Acceptance 

2009

Their first night together certainly wasn’t the last. After another few secretly sleepless hours in one bed, the girls yawn over the break of day. Alex barely has enough time to crawl out of bed, sneak out of the house and get a shower at her place. She told her dad she was spending the night at Amy’s. Problem is, Amy told her parents the truth about their relationship. How it has evolved from friendship over being soulmates to being in love. Now, the Wolfe family has been wonderful over that revelation, it’s just that Amy feels a bit weird now, asking permission to let Alex spend the night. It used to be a thing that came naturally. Alex came by, Alex spent the night – nothing weird about it.

Continue reading “AA-meetings – Chapter 6: Acceptance” →

AA-meetings – Chapter 5: Aching Desire

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 Aching desire

2009

Word’s going around about Alex’s first big photoshoot. Any second now and her face will be glued all over town. Any second and hell will break lose in this school over it. She’s always been one of the popular girls, but this will bring it to a whole new level. The girl can’t wait for what’s next concerning her career. That feeling of an entire crew being at your disposal, just to get one perfect shot – it’s amazing. Modeling is, weirdly enough, hard work. You can spend hours waiting time before you even get on set – before the client, the model and the photographer are pleased about the result. She doesn’t mind, though. She could stare at the lens and take positions for an eternity. Just like she could stare into Amy’s eyes for just as long.

Continue reading “AA-meetings – Chapter 5: Aching Desire” →